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The Undervaluation of Kindness in the World of Work

The Undervaluation of Kindness in the World of Work

by | Aug 16, 2017 | Leadership, Productivity, World of Work

The world of work as we know it today, is increasingly fueled by targets, deadlines and achievements. We are in the midst of what can be called the crisis of modernity. And yet we have failed to acknowledge it, let alone work towards changing it. Today, we regard the human body working in clock work to ‘achieve’ and ‘deliver’, as normal. Which brings us back to the age old debate, as old as modernity itself, what then distinguishes us from machines? Two things which make us humane, kindness, and compassion, distinguish us from machines.

About two thirds of our day is spend at our work place. While many of us love our work place, there are many who dread it. While the reasons why one many not like ones workplace could be many, one of the primary reasons is the attitude and nature of the co-workers or colleagues. Many a times, we fail to understand how being sensitive, compassionate and kind, can make a world of difference to the people we deal with in the world of work.

Kindness is genuinely undervalued in the world of work. Many managers and leaders feel that elements of kindness and compassion are in direct conflict with professionalism. One couldn’t be farther away from truth. You can be professional and yet be a kind and compassionate human being. In fact, your productivity and work life balance are influenced a great deal by how happy you are in your work place. What are the three most simple things that you can do to practice kindness at work? Here they are –

Listen

When someone speaks to you, listen. And not with your mouth so you can respond or react. Listen not just with your ears, but also with your mind. We mean listening not just in the effective communication sense, but in this case more in the humanitarian sense. Listen out of kindness. One example could be a form of miscommunication between you and your subordinate at work relating to non-achievement of established goals. The conclusion you see is that the work has not been done, however, give your colleague a chance to explain why the work hasn’t been done. Unless you listen, you will not know whether the reason was valid or not. More importantly, unless you listen, you will never know how you end up hurting someone who is already in a tough place. This has a direct effect on the productivity of the employee.

Reset when Angry

It is not easy to stay calm when things get chaotic at work. At times like that it is our individual responsibility to take charge of our own anger. Emerson said it best, “for every minute you remain angry, you give up sixty seconds of peace of mind.” However, it is  not only your peace of mind which gets affected, but also of those around you. When you are angry, even the smallest of errors can provoke unnecessarily exaggerated reactions – which you may regret later. More importantly, your reaction might pull someone down in a way you may not even have imagined.

Every time you feel angry and find that the anger is about to be directed at someone, reset. What does reset mean? It means go away from the issue, do something that brings you back to normal, and then look at the issue again. Allow a cooling period before you react or respond. If all us could put this into practice in our daily lives, and in the world of work, it would indeed be a much better world. While we can’t claim responsibility for everyone, we can at least do so for ourselves.

Smile

You would be surprised how therapeutic a smile can feel for someone who’s having a tough day. That one tiny gesture can make a world of difference in just saying, “it’ll all be alright”, or “it is going to be alright.” They don’t lie when they say, ‘you never know how your smile can brighten up someone’s day.’

We came across a lovely post on The Balance, on “Random Acts of Kindness at Work“. And here is a list of what our favorite random acts of kindness are, from the article –

  • “Bring your coworker a cup of coffee when she looks like she needs a pick-me-up.
  • Share your mid-afternoon snack with him or if you don’t want to share, bring an extra one (everyone gets hungry a couple of hours after lunch).
  • Buy your coworker her favorite iced cold beverage on the first warm day of the year.
  • Offer to stay at work late or come in early to help a coworker with a difficult project (don’t wait to be asked).
  • Praise him for a job well done. No one can get too many compliments.
  • If you see someone is about to make a mistake, try to intervene to prevent it.
  • Offer unsolicited advice, especially to a new colleague who seems to be floundering.
  • Stop others from spreading a rumor about someone.
  • If you see something you know your colleague will absolutely love, a book about a topic in which he’s interested for example (nothing too extravagant), get it for him.
  • Include a less experienced colleague in a meeting or on a project that can help her grow.”

And these ones too!

  • “Invite him to join your lunch group especially if he doesn’t have many workplace friends.
  • Stop by her desk to say good morning.
  • Stop by his desk to say goodbye.
  • Hold the (otherwise unoccupied) elevator while your colleague runs back to her desk to get something she forgot even if you’re in a hurry to leave the building.
  • Praise her to the boss who may not realize how hard she’s working.
  • Offer to  mentor an inexperienced coworker. Many people are too shy to ask or may not even think of it.”

We are often so caught up in our busy work lives that we forget people who work tirelessly, round the clock, putting in longer hours than us and surely receiving lesser incentives than us, to make our jobs easier. Some time ago, we wrote this post on Gratitude for People Around us At Work, and this post seems like a perfect reason to revisit it again.

Would we be able to spend a day at work without coffee? Doesn’t all hell break loose when there is no Wi-Fi even for a few minutes? God help us if the IT guy chose to take a leave on the very same day! This post is about 5 such people at work, who are definitely way more important than we give them credit for! Being grateful, and being kind, go hand in hand like nothing else!

One kind act a day, sure does keeps the blues away!

 
Bringing in the Mindfulness – Top 5 Quotes

Bringing in the Mindfulness – Top 5 Quotes

by | Aug 8, 2017 | Managing Yourself, Motivation, Productivity, World of Work

A while ago, we wrote about Practicing the Miracle of Mindfulness at Work. In it, we spoke about how to incorporate the practice of mindfulness into your every day routine of work. While mindfulness, in its essence really means to “be”, different people have different ways of saying it. There is nothing more inspiring than reading how other people have experienced mindfulnes, and what they understand the concept of mindfulness as. Here is a selection of the five best ones!

  1. Like we said, the shortest definition of mindfulness is really to just “be”.

“In today’s rush, we all think too much — seek too much — want too much — and forget about the joy of just being.” Eckhart Tolle

2. To be present is probably the key to achieving mindfulness, and therefore, could be the hardest thing to achieve. To be present means to be nowhere else, to do nothing else but what the present moment asks of you. Being present means to give your entire being to accomplishing the current task at hand with all your attention, love and care.

“Mindfulness is simply being aware of what is happening right now without wishing it were different; enjoying the pleasant without holding on when it changes (which it will); being with the unpleasant without fearing it will always be this way (which it won’t).” ~James Baraz

3. Turn away from focusing on what you ‘don’t’ have. Make a list of things you are grateful for, and you’ll realize that the list is ever expansive.

“There’s only one reason why you’re not experiencing bliss at this present moment, and it’s because you’re thinking or focusing on what you don’t have…. But, right now you have everything you need to be in bliss.” ~Anthony de Mello

4. Mindfulness is the coming together of the conscious and the subconscious, in a way more powerful than you ever imagined. Being mindful is a means and an end at the same time. To practice being mindful means to channelize the highest levels of energy within yourself towards a purpose you have chosen for yourself.

The practice of mindfulness begins in the small, remote cave of your unconscious mind and blossoms with the sunlight of your conscious life, reaching far beyond the people and places you can see.” ~Earon Davis

5. Yes, he couldn’t be more accurate. Your entire life revolves around how you savor or rush through your cup of tea. It is only when we are able to truly appreciate what we are gifted with, that we begin to invoke more blessings. “Live the actual moment”. Is mindfulness your cup of tea?

“Drink your tea slowly and reverently, as if it is the axis on which the world earth revolves – slowly, evenly, without rushing toward the future; live the actual moment. Only this moment is life.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh”

The practice of mindfulness has the potential to rejuvenate and restore us as individuals. Gratitude and being aware of everything, and everyone, is the key to being mindful. Or like we say, to be mindful is to be happy in the now!

The Art of Firing – What’s the Best Way?

The Art of Firing – What’s the Best Way?

by | Jul 27, 2017 | Communication, Management, World of Work

A few weeks ago, the internet was breaking with how Tech Mahindra fired an employee- without sound reason, without even having a one on one. A leaked audio of the HR Firing an employee brought the issue to the forefront. The matter escalated to such an extent that Anand Mahindra, Executive Chairman of the company, had to tender an apology which read, “I want to add my personal apology. Our core value is to preserve the dignity of the individual and we’ll ensure this does not happen in future,”.

It is true that letting someone go, moreover, having to be the one to communicate that decision, is far from easy. However, doing it in a dignified manner is crucial for the person in question, and even more so for your organisation. How you deal with your employees in times of crises reflects on what values your organisation embodies. We write this post for every person who has the capacity of making, and/or implementing the decision of firing an employee within an organisation. So, how do you fire someone while making sure his/her ‘dignity’ is not violated? Read on to know how.

  1. Know your Reasons

    Your job is half done when you understand and get to the root of why you are having to let go of the person concerned. Understand the reasons for the decision made to be able to articulate yourself clearly. Is it performance related? Is it because of behavioral or ethical reasons? Keep the required evidence handy to be able to support your conversation/ decision, if required. Doing this also helps you be firm while you are communicating the decision.

  2. Rehearse it

    Firing someone is much harder than hiring someone. It needs to be done with sensitivity and dignity. It also needs to be done with conviction. Rehearse what you would want to tell the employee concerned before having the actual conversation. This will help you preempt certain responses you would otherwise have been at a loss for. Playing out the conversation aloud, helps you prepare well for the real one.

  3. Time it right

    Timing is a key element for this job. Never hold this meeting at the beginning of the day – it upsets the productivity of both you and the employee concerned. As for the duration of the meeting, it should by no means stretch beyond fifteen minutes. Anything beyond that duration of time allows for things to get messy. While you have to be patient, you also need to be effective in your communication, and quick. Tough combination to achieve, but then, this is really your job!

  4. Follow a process

    Be fair when you fire someone and follow a standard operating procedure, just like you do while hiring someone. Have all the documentation ready, including a letter of experience and a termination letter. Hold the meeting when you have in paper all the settlements you would have to make for the employee concerned. It is also important to allow a reasonable notice period to the employee, so he may look for another job.

  5. Be kind

    The action in question, and kindness definitely don’t go together. However, it is still possible to deliver this job in a kind, considerate and dignified manner. The only way you can do this job well, and yet be kind is by being detached from the whole situation. Just enough to know that it is not YOUR fault the person in front of you is losing his/her job, at the same time it is sad for the employee and therefore you must be polite, kind and treat the individual with dignity. Being detached will also help you stay calm in case things start to get ugly, because you don’t take it personally. That way, you will by default take the higher road.

Ace businesswoman Mary Barra, says it best

My advice on firing is simple: Treat that person the same way you’d want to be treated if you were in that situation. They’re still a good person, just not the right fit. So how do you help them move on in a productive way that allows them to maintain their dignity?

Ever fired anyone? Tell us what you got wrong, or what you got right. Been at the receiving end of it? Tell us how you feel you would’ve done it differently!

Best Fiction Reads – You Deserve a Breather

Best Fiction Reads – You Deserve a Breather

by | Jul 20, 2017 | Life, Restart

Very few things offer the same kind of giddy, yet delicate excitement like the time when you are in love. But one thing you can be sure will offer you not just the same, but far greater happiness and joy, is reading a book. Falling in love with the words, sentences, phrases and verse, with the protagonist, the villain or the sidekick, is something else. Discovering through the ideologies of the narrator your own ideologies. And sometimes even finding the words you’ve been struggling to find, through the words of the author; which makes you say – “this book was written for me.” Away from the world of work, we have curated a list of five beautiful Fiction Reads which will flip your world on its head.

  1. The Sense of an Ending, Julian Barnes

    This piece of work deserves every bit of the credit it has received. It won the Booker prize in 2011 . Barnes, a magician, plays with the concept of time as if it were play dough. He twists and turns the plot any which way he pleases – through the voice of an omnipresent narrator. A moving, hilarious, and nail-biting exploration of the self, friendships and relationships. When you make it to the end, tell us if you know the answer to the question he asks.

  2. The Rosie Project, Graeme Simsion

    When I started reading this book, I said to myself, “I have never read anything like this before.” And I wasn’t wrong. Don Tillman, a “socially challenged” genetics professor who has never been on a second date embarks on a certain project to find himself a wife. He calls it “The Wife Project”, and designs questionnaires for all the potential suitors he wants to “screen”. Don’t cringe yet. Read it to find out the hilarious bends and twists of his encounter with Rosie.

  3. The Goldfinch, Donna Tartt

    This work of beauty has to its credit a very deserving Pulitzer prize for fiction. Do not be intimidated by the size of the book because you will feel sorry when it gets over. It is that good. It is the story of a little boy who loses his mother to a bomb blast and ends up with a painting. The painting decides the trajectory of the rest of his life. Every page of this book will have you laughing and crying along with the narrator.

  4. The Shadow of the Wind, Carlos Ruiz Zafon

    Set against the background of the aftermath of the Spanish Civil war in Barcelona, this is a story of love, lost and found, and books lost and found in “forgotten cemeteries”. Passionately crafted and narrated, Carlos Zafon weaves magic by taking us around Barcelona through this story you will never forget. They don’t lie when they say, books help you see the world without leaving where you’re sitting at.

  5. Stardust, Neil Gaiman

    A must read if you are a fiction fan. Gaiman, a wizard with words is at his imaginative best with this book. No matter how old you are, you will believe in magic when you read this book. In a beautiful way, Gaiman explores the surreal, and the ethereal only by grounding it in very real and concrete everyday things – feelings. What happens when a boy goes out to find a shooting star that fell from the sky for his lover? You’ll have to find out for yourself.

If you’re contemplating a break and don’t know what to read, here you are spoilt for choices. If you’d really like a break but can’t take one – pick up any one of these books and feel yourself being transported very far away from wherever you are. Because you deserve a breather!

Why is Feedback Important?

Why is Feedback Important?

by | Jul 13, 2017 | Business Operations, Communication, Management, Performance

The world that we inhabit today, is characterized most frequently by the relationship between consumers and service providers. The reason being, a majority of our actions are defined by either consumption or provision of services. We could be at the receiving end or at the end of delivery, whether directly or indirectly. Regardless, it is a present continuous action. Starting from the Ubers we ride in, to the food we eat at restaurants, to the ever so frequently used online shopping and delivery services, or even the work that we do at our respective workplaces every day – there is one common thread binding all of this, which is the action of providing and receiving services.If services are such a crucial part of our everyday lives, why then do we take the one mechanism in place which ensures its smooth and efficient delivery for granted? Namely, feedback.

Its importance cannot be stressed enough. One might dismiss the importance of feedback by saying, “what’s the use, I am not going to be taken seriously”. Or, “oh it doesn’t matter, (s)he doesn’t really know what they’re speaking about”, if we’re receiving feedback.

However that is no longer the case. Why? Because of the stiff competition between the service providers of the same services. The one thing that sets them apart is how valuable they consider feedback and incorporate the same into their services. Which is why feedback in the world of services today is very relevant and important. And when we say services, we don’t just mean the large-scale services, we mean just any kind of service – even the kind that you deliver every day at work.

What are some other ways in which feedback is crucial? Have a look –

  1. You get a sense of direction and purpose

    It is only with appropriate feedback or constructive criticism that you realize how much progress you’re making in what you’re doing. Proper, articulate feedback helps you understand how far you’ve come, and how much further you see yourself going. You realize what’s working and what’s not, and it spurs you to think of ways to take yourself closer to what you envision as your purpose.

  2. It inhibits stagnation

    Without constructive criticism and feedback, it is easy to develop a sense of complacency. You keep doing things in a fixed manner without knowing if you’re really moving closer to your objective and goals. While you may not necessarily get worse at what you’re doing, it won’t be possible to get any better either. Having a system of feedback and incorporating the same into your work gets rid of the otherwise inevitable stagnation.

  3. It fosters growth and evolution

    With feedback, you understand which direction you need to push harder in. It also makes you realize if you need to change your approach and adapt to new environments. That is exactly how you learn and evolve as individuals and not surprisingly, even as businesses/ services. It helps you realize if the work that you’re doing is adding value in any way, and if it isn’t how do you change your game plan to evolve.

  4. A sense of fulfillment

    Feedback doesn’t necessarily have to be just negative. It can also be positive. In fact, every time you appreciate a particular service, let them know why you liked it. Remember that you would feel valued as well, if someone told you that you were doing a good job. It goes without saying that getting positive feedback for your work is a very motivating and fulfilling feeling. It cements your sense of purpose and gives you confidence to forge ahead in the direction you have imagined.

The process of giving and receiving feedback is not easy, and is a matter of responsibility at both ends of the spectrum.

Very often, we are quick to deliver feedback in what one may call “absolute” terms, without really considering our thoughts carefully. Karen Naumann in her article on why feedback is important makes a very valid point when she speaks about how it is important to be “professional” and “kind” while delivering feedback –

“So, before we give someone feedback, we really need to check our own motives and current mood whether we feel stressed, annoyed, jealous, afraid, or simply have antipathy towards the other person. And then it is on us to really look at the performance of the other person professionally and kindly, with the goal of helping them unlock their greatest potential.

On the flip side however, that’s also exactly why giving and receiving feedback is not easy for any of us, whether it is positive or “negative” nature. It really does require a great amount of one of our most difficult lifelong tasks called self-reflection, as well as humbleness and openness to different opinions and thoughts on the giver’s and receiver’s end.”

What is your opinion on how important feedback is? How are the processes of giving and receiving feedback different? Want the world of work to be able to learn through your experience? Let us know about your thoughts right here!