Making it (to) Work when you’re not Feeling 100%

Making it (to) Work when you’re not Feeling 100%

While ideally the private and the professional life need to be kept distinct from each other, in reality it is a very thin, and porous line dividing the two. The line is especially blurred and porous when your mental health is suffering, and you are not at a great place in your life. You could be dealing with the insurmountable loss of a parent, an extremely bad break up, a lack of stability in your personal life, coping with being friendless in a new city, or sometimes even feeling anxious and depressed for no reason at all. On days like these, when you are going through hell, how do you get yourself to Work? How do you clock it from 9 to 5, without letting the battle you are fighting within, take over?

Half the job is done when you decide to show up

Yes, at times, it is enough to just be able to summon the will power to show up. Set backs can be extremely difficult to deal with. Respect the fact that you are after all a human being who is not immune to hurt and heart break. Your will to perform and be productive at work is not independent of your mental health status. More than anything else, your mental health status is not a switch which can be turned on at 9 am and turned off at 5 pm. On days like these, getting out of bed, getting dressed, having breakfast and just making it to your desk on time is enough. It is progress, and it is something you should be proud of being able to do. Because on days like these, just showing up can be the most difficult thing to do. Just show up – that’s all you need to do until you’re feeling better.

Do the mundane, and the everyday – a routine can work wonders

When you are depressed and still getting over what has happened, you might find yourself craving anything but the ordinary, the mundane. Doing the everyday things scare us the most. Because given our frame of mind at that point, it is easier to distract ourselves, than to focus on doing things that need to be done. It is easier to stress eat, than to follow an established exercise routine. When you feel like you are being swept away by feelings of commotion within you, don’t run to distractions, let it pass and turn to the regular chore that demands your focus. Remember that it is only when you start doing the everyday things, when you start following a routine and discipline yourself will you truly be able to come back.

So show up at work, and do what you would have done on an ordinary day. Even if it is boring. Even if it feels like the most difficult thing to do in the world is to sit at your desk and draft an email to your client. Do it, and give yourself a pat for having achieved what you thought was the most difficult thing ever. And then keep doing enough of these tasks till you start feeling like you’ve got this.

Accept help – it is okay to not be okay

When someone has a broken leg in a cast at work, there are so many people who notice that he might need some extra help. Unfortunately, not many people are good at reading the subtle, and not-so-subtle signs of when someone is suffering from bad mental health. Wish there was some kind of cast for that, but there isn’t-yet. It is important to accept the help that is offered to you when you are dealing with mental health issues. It is important not just because it will help you, but also because it is an exercise in sensitizing other people around you who need to be more sensitive in identifying people who are not feeling a 100%, and offering to help. It is equally important for people who are not feeling okay, to know that they can reach out for help, and accept the help that is offered.

Be gentle with yourself, accept everything you’re feeling

Some days you will succeed in showing up, some days you won’t. And that’s okay. Some days you’ll feel inspired to be disciplined and follow a routine, some days you just want to eat cake all day. And that’s okay. Some days you’ll reach out for help and accept it when it’s given to you, on other days, you just want to be left alone. That’s okay too! Remember that more than anything else, you need to be gentle and patient with yourself. The road to emotional recovery is not linear. You might stick to a routine for a week, and then find yourself in a slump for the next five days. Don’t feel disheartened. Don’t feel like you’re back to square one. Because emotional healing is not linear, it is a constant journey. A journey inward where you discover something new about yourself every day.

If today is feeling especially rough, take courage and know that it will get better. Know that it’s always the darkest before the dawn. And know that above all, you are not alone.

5 Things to do after Resigning

5 Things to do after Resigning

Resigning from a job can be a blessing in disguise. The time in between leaving a job and joining another one can truly be the forced sabbatical you always needed but had not been able to take. Well, now since you have some time on your hand, you may as well make good use of it rather than brooding about what is coming up next. With our crazy schedules, most of us have forgotten to enjoy living, it is the clockwork, deadlines and projects we are most concerned about. If you are in between two jobs, with some time to indulge yourself, here are the five things you must try doing!

  1. Travel –

    Make plans for that much awaited trip and set out. Better still, don’t wait to ‘make plans’, because that’s what you have been doing until now because of which you still haven’t been able to leave! Be impulsive and just go, we assume here that you have some savings! Well, even if you don’t you can always travel on a shoe-string budget instead of luxury traveling. Traveling allows you the much-needed time for soul-searching and at the same time rejuvenate you.

    If you have been feeling scattered lately due to all the transition and the fear of not knowing what lies ahead, maybe traveling is the much-needed change you need? At times we feel like a mess, like pieces of a jigsaw that just don’t seem to be fitting together. If you are a traveler lost in the world of work with no time for yourself but have had this break imposed upon you, it is the perfect opportunity for you to find the missing pieces of jigsaw and glue them back together, through traveling.

  1. Reconnect with a forgotten hobby –

    Does it sound weird to you just hearing the word ‘hobby’? Does it sound like a word which got lost somewhere between activity periods in school and the process of becoming a ‘professional’? If you find yourself silently responding in the affirmative, maybe it is going to do you a lot of good to try to reconnect with something you used to love doing. Gardening? Baking? Trekking? Fishing? Rock Climbing? Collage making? Painting? It could be anything! Think about what it was and try going back to it. It will surprise how light you will begin to feel.

    It will surprise even more, when you will notice the clarity in thought the particular activity you choose, will bring you. At times when we are extremely muddled up, we need to let go and do other things we enjoy doing. A lot of mess is usually created through us imagining unnecessarily complicated situations, which are not actually real. In diverting our attention to more creative processes that we enjoy doing, help us think more clearly and approach the problems in a more rational and analytical manner rather than in a state of panic.

  1. Meet people you love but haven’t had time for –

    The aunt who kept inviting you over for dinner but you kept cancelling because of the board meeting the next day? The old school friend who you promised a couple of drinks but never got around to meeting because you didn’t really have any weekends? The beautiful date you have been thinking of for the longest time now? Well, now is the time you always wished you had to spend with your loved ones but never quite managed to. Draw up a list of people you like, used to like to spend time with, and people who would be happy to see you. Reaching out and connecting with them will make you positive and happy.

  1. Read –

    If you’ve been a voracious reader anyway, this is the perfect time to indulge yourself some more! If not, there couldn’t be a better time to start. Reading helps recharge your intellectual resources and keeps those brainy ideas flowing. Reading fires your imagination. Just like a balanced diet is essential for a healthy body, balanced reading is crucial for a healthy mind. Make sure your reading time consists of a mixed menu of current affairs, fiction and non-fiction.

  1. Organize-

    Making the most of this time is extremely important and you could use it to get yourself a head start. Start by organizing the documents you will need for the job you are planning to apply for, or for the job you have already bagged. Create a checklist of all the things you will be needing. Clear out your desk, rearrange the furniture in your study, and dust the shelves! Bring in the positive vibes that say you are ready for a brand new start!

 

Live your life to the fullest. And don’t forget to be #HappyInTheNow !