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Working with a Difficult Coworker

Working with a Difficult Coworker

How we all wish that we only got to work with people we get along with like a house on fire (how much sense does that metaphor make, really?). Unfortunately, no matter how hard we wish this will never be the case. The world of work is a diverse, ever dynamic space. And very much a part of the tough, real world which teaches us very many lessons about life. One being, regardless of whether you like it or not, there will be times when you have to work with a difficult coworker or two. Maybe even coworkers you say you ‘hate’. Now, while hate is a very strong four lettered word (which is also injurious to health), we do understand the strong sentiments at play there.

While you cannot avoid these situations where you will be needed to work with coworkers you don’t exactly get along with, here are some tips that will probably lessen the suffering.

  1. Stop. And Breathe.

    It is strange how much we underestimate the value of this critical life function. Breathing is the only thing that separates life from death. ‘Take a deep breath’, is the most under rated thing. Every time you feel overcome with anxiety and pressure because you are unable to cope with a difficult coworker, breathe. Just remind yourself to breathe. You will be surprised how effective this technique is. Try this zen technique called STOP: S- Step back. T – Take a breath. O- Observe. P- Proceed.

  2. Take it as a challenge

    This situation won’t last forever. But while it lasts, how about you make the best of it? If nothing else, let it teach you how to function in what you may call, adverse situations. Does it feel like if you survive this, you can survive anything? Well then, you’ve got to get through it. Anything that makes you feel invincible is worth it. Find a way of making this seem like a challenge, and then take on it. By the end of it, you will feel proud of yourself.

  3. Play by the rules

    In case the lack of harmony between you and the other party concerned stems from mostly difference in opinion regarding the work you are doing, play by the rules. That way, you cannot get into any trouble and any cause of discontent regarding the rules is not your problem. You did not come up with them, you are simply following them. Every time you need to remind your co-worker about the same, do so gently. And do let them know that they have the option of taking it up with the management.

  4. Don’t make the mistake of trying to change them, change yourself

    When we are sure that we are right, we bend over backwards to ‘prove’ to the other person that we are right. What we do not understand is, that the person at the other end perhaps also has his/ her very strong reasons in believing they are right. Which they are hell-bent on proving. Getting into a tussle of this sort in a professional space can be extremely draining, not to mention a serious deterrent to your productivity. So instead of trying to change the other person involved, change your approach. You can have absolutely no control over anything which is beyond yourself. The sooner you realize this, the more time and energy you will save. And by no means will you be conceding defeat in any way by doing this.

  5. Be professional – No matter how angry you are

    Dislike for a difficult coworker is no reason to display unprofessional behavior. Remember that by doing so you will be harming no one but yourself. No matter how angry you are, handle the situation professionally and in a respectful manner. When you feel that the situation is getting out of hand, reach out to the management for a conflict resolution intervention. Take care for the situation to not turn into a judgment call on your reputation or professionalism.

While it can’t be easy to deal with a situation like this, it surely isn’t impossible. And like they say, it is the worst situations that bring out the best in you! What is the worst quality of a someone you would call a difficult coworker? Comment below and we will include your take on that, in our next blog!

A Little Something to Help you Through the Week

A Little Something to Help you Through the Week

It’s only Tuesday today, and the weekend couldn’t seem farther. No long weekends until Christmas which is more than a month away. Oh gosh, was Diwali that long ago? Oh well, it is not as bad as we world of workers seem to make it, with a bit of inspiration. Feeling productive comes closest to feeling invincible, this is something we believe firmly at OBOlinx. To help you Through the Week, we’ve put together this 2 minute read which hopefully will leave you feeling inspired, motivated and ready to take on the world! A compilation of the best quotes on productivity, for you. Your dose of Tuesday inspiration!

Enough of “doing” is what leads to actualization of outcomes

You don’t actually do a project; you can only do action steps related to it. When enough of the right action steps have been taken, some situation will have been created that matches your initial picture of the outcome closely enough that you can call it “done.” – David Allen

Never wait. Get up and hustle.

Amateurs sit and wait for inspiration, the rest of us just get up and go to work. Stephen King

There is a difference between being busy and being productive. The real question is, what are you busy with?

Being busy does not always mean real work. The object of all work is production or accomplishment and to either of these ends there must be forethought, system, planning, intelligence, and honest purpose, as well as perspiration. Seeming to do is not doing. Thomas A. Edison

Whatever your passion is. Find it, and let it consume you.

In trying to find who you are, be less destructive and more constructive. Look at art or whatever your passion is and be productive. Nirrimi Joy Hakanson

Do what you love. Love what you do.

Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. Steve Jobs

Go that extra mile to plan. Go further to execute that plan.

Plans are nothing; planning is everything. Dwight D. Eisenhower

Because today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. So make your “now” count, and look forward to tomorrow.

Tomorrow is the most important thing in life. Comes into us at midnight very clean. It’s perfect when it arrives and it puts itself in our hands. It hopes we’ve learned something from yesterday. John Wayne

Over thinking is the death of productivity.

If you spend too much time thinking about a thing, you’ll never get it done. Bruce Lee

Oops. A bit audacious but true. Patience is the key and all great things take time.

 No matter how great the talent or efforts, some things just take time. You can’t produce a baby in one month by getting nine women pregnant. Warren Buffett

Nothing is more precious than being happy in the now. The true elixir of productivity. The end.

I enjoy writing, I enjoy my house, my family and, more than anything I enjoy the feeling of seeing each day used to the full to actually produce something. The end.  Michael Palin

Enjoyed reading our post? Tell us about your favorite productivity quote!

What Makes a Dream Team?

What Makes a Dream Team?

Dream teams are what come together to create magic. It always seems like a great team fits together like perfect pieces of jigsaw made to fit together. However, that is seldom the case. There is no magic unless you create it. Likewise, a dream team is the result of careful, effective and applied leadership and thought. To make a dream team takes a certain amount of acumen. But making what you call, ‘a dream team’, what do you look for? Here are the five most important (magic) ingredients, that come together to make the secret (not so secret anymore) magic sauce of a dream team! Read on to know.

What to look for, to make a ‘dream team’

Look for, Emotional Intelligence

One of the most important characteristics of a great team is for team members to have not just the needed technical skills, but more importantly to possess emotional intelligence. Being aware of what is happening around them, and having the capacity to respond accordingly is a very important quality to seek, while looking to build a team. Social sensitivity and awareness goes a longer way than technical skills. And we are not just saying that, research says so too.

A study carried by Anita Woolley from Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, and her colleagues, measured group intelligence and how each individual influences it. Woolley placed 699 people in teams of two to five and got them to carry out a series of tasks, such as solving puzzles, brainstorming, typing and negotiating. The groups were then evaluated on their performance, and given a group intelligence score.As it turns out, neither the intelligence of the smartest member, nor the average intelligence of the group, influenced the overall group intelligence. Instead, social sensitivity—the ability to understand the feelings and thoughts of others—was the most important factor that influenced the overall group intelligence.” [source]

Look for, Diversity

Very often one tends to think that like-minded people coming together make for a great team. Frankly, it is diversity in thought and personality that make for a great team. Quirks are important and quirks of different people are important. It is this difference that outlines the overall personality of your team as a whole. A healthy diversity also means paying attention to being inclusive. It is the diversity of a team that makes way for great stimulating discussions, which are the genesis of amazing ideas. Besides, with a diverse team, things never get boring and you always have each other to learn from and grow with!

Look for, Proactive Communicators

Before you begin your hunt for proactive communicators, it is first essential to understand what proactive communication is. Communicating proactively means to think a step ahead. To anticipate and to act on it. A proactive communicator will go the extra mile, and very often it is not even out-of-the-way, but only a sensitive gesture. Emotional intelligence and proactive communication are in a way interdependent.

Examples of proactive communication?

  • “Team members provide information before being asked.
  • Provide support and assistance before being asked.
  • They take team initiative by providing guidance and making suggestions to other team members.
  • They provide updates, creating situational awareness for other team members. [source]

Look for, a Leader

At the center of a great team, is a good leader. But who is a good leader? Someone who can guide, motivate and just ‘be there’ for the team. A good leader is like-able, and at the same time formidable – a weird combination? But its true.  Like John C.Maxwell once very rightly said, “You know you are a good leader when your team does not hesitate to approach you, but never wants to let you down. If you are a leader, you should never forget that everyone needs encouragement. And everyone who receives it – young or old, successful or less-than-successful, unknown or famous – is changed by it.”

Most importantly, a leader recognizes the value of leadership skills in every member of the team. And that is what makes a great team.

Look for, Fun!

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy, yes sir. A team that has fun together, stays together. When looking to create a dream team, never miss out on looking for fun. It is indeed one of the most important secret ingredients for an indivisible team. To have a team which knows how to have fun, and work hard makes the journey so much more enjoyable. You live your work – and that is a blessed feeling. To have a team which knows how to have fun, is one of the finest ways to be happy in the now!

Like everything else, building a team is a process which requires patience and skill. It does not happen over night, but when it does, it is indeed the stuff of dreams!

What is your notion of a “dream team”?

A letter for the Young Professional

A letter for the Young Professional

Dear Young Professional,

Here you are, finally living the much coveted and cherished ‘independent’ life you have been waiting for, through years of school and maybe somewhat more rebellious years of college. How does it feel? Are you giddy with excitement, or surprised because you did not expect to feel indifferent, of all things. Any which way, welcome to the world of ‘adulting’, as we millennials put it, and, to the world of work.

The unfortunate part about being a young professional in the world of work today, is that we have been groomed, and taught to believe and act according to the knowledge that the said world “expects” professionals who have just graduated to come with a load of experience, skills and a ‘win the world’ personality. To some extent, this is not entirely misplaced. To a large extent, it is. Being a young professional in the world of work today is much harder than it ever was because of the debilitating (the word ‘stiff’ won’t describe it half as well) competition we have been brought up to strive through, thrive through. Right from school, words and phrases like ‘rat race’ have been highlighted in fluorescent markers in the dictionary of our memories. As a result, anything short of excellence, anything short of being the ‘best’ seems to be getting asked to move on.

In your strive to ‘fit in’ to the mold of perfection which has been your shadow since the first time a parent may have told you, “…but why not better?”, try not to forget who you really are. Like Oscar Wilde said, “Be yourself because everyone else is taken.” It feels good to look back, every now and then and realize that you have come a long way and have only just started. Instead of getting bogged down by what we millennials call ‘adulting’, try and find joy in this journey of yours – which has only just started – the best part of being free and independent to discover yourself through what you choose to do. To stop and pause, and process, is something each one of us owes ourselves. If not for this, we might well be machines – doing just the right amount of thinking we are “wired” to do. While many parts of this journey might scare you and force you to look at things in a certain way that may make you uncomfortable, after have also been trained about which perspective is ‘right’ and which is ‘wrong’, take it as it comes. You may discover that what you once thought was ‘wrong’ is indeed just another shade of gray – not necessarily right or wrong.

Away from cut-offs, placement talks and placement drives, CGPAs and CV designs, welcome to a very real world – defined maybe by all these aspects, but it is really up to you to open your eyes and look beyond them into a horizon of very many possibilities. This really is a space which gives you the freedom and space to unlearn everything so you may learn again. The true learnings are in fact those that disintegrate and come together, forming the atoms that make you up. It is through your work, the space and the people that you now spend a greater portion of your time with that will begin to be central to this new journey of yours. And indeed, it is important to look beyond projects and deadlines, promotions and packages, meetings and partnerships, and build relationships that have more to them than just opportunities.

Seeking mentors, being fearless, taking risks (calculated ones!), being prudent, being foolish, working hard, learning to live, but most of all learning to be in the moment, to be happy in the now and finding joy in the beautiful journey of growth is what the world of work could be all about. Only if we choose to make it that way.

Love,

A Young Professional on a Beautiful Journey of Learning and Growth.

How to Implement Gender Equality in the Workplace

How to Implement Gender Equality in the Workplace

Important conversations such as gender equality at the workplace, need to take place more often and more consistently. In order to be able to really implement gender equality in the workplace, the dialogue, and urge to bring about change needs to be consistent, and frequent and not sporadic – limited to women’s day speeches.

In one of our previous posts, we spoke extensively about the glass ceiling, and how to shatter it. In a more recent post, we explored the importance of gender diversity at the workplace. Tackling the issue of gender discrimination at the workplace, is like addressing the elephant in the room. Uncomfortable questions need to be raised, and attempts must be made to address, and redress them. While men and women are ‘entitled’ to equal rights by law, this still remains a distant dream. A quick glance at only a few facts and statistics (source: medreps.com) will prove why:

  • Women often still earn less than men in the same role, despite a successful salary negotiation.

  • Before knowing anything about the candidate’s skills or experience, employers expect male candidates to perform better than women.

  • Women who describe themselves in feminine terms such as ‘warm’ or ‘supportive’ are less likely to be considered for a job in a male dominated field than if they were to use masculine terms such as ‘assertive.’

  • Men are more likely to apply for any role that takes their interest, even if they only meet 60% of the requirements.

  • Women are more selective and will only apply for jobs that they think suit their skills and personality and fit 100% of the requirements for

These facts and statistics on gender discrimination relating to recruitment and salary, pervade the day-to-day work cycle, and become an everyday reality of deeply rooted gender biases and discrimination at the workplace.  In order to implement gender equality as an everyday reality, we need to adopt focused methods to make our workplaces equitable and inclusive.

Where do we begin? Right here.

1. Gender Equality – Understanding the principle of equity over equality

In order to address gender discrimination, we first need to acknowledge the deep-rooted history of gender inequality and discrimination world over. In doing so, we realize that women have been deliberately subjected to a backward footing, as compared to men. Hence, more than equality, they need equity. But what is the difference between equality, and equity? Here is a common yet effective anecdote that brings out the difference beautifully –

Imagine that you are at a baseball game and have to look over a fence in order to see the game. There are also several others who are in the same situation as you are. The fence is quite high so everyone needs a stepping stool of some sort to see over the fence. In equality, everyone would get the same sized stepping stool. Thus, one can immediately see a glaring problem! Not everyone is the same height. This is where equity steps in. In being equitable, everyone would get different sized stepping stools so that they could all see over the fence. Everyone would get a chance to view the game.

Gender equity is a prerequisite for gender equality. Men and women did not start off on equal footing. Years of subjugation and discrimination demand that in the current day, women get that little “extra” push, and support in order to bring about equality. Without a focus on equity, the hope for equality is misplaced and cannot be achieved.

2. Gender Equality – Acknowledging and challenging your own bias

An article on one of our favorite sites – UndercoverRecruiter, says it best. The best way to bring about effective and impactful change is by working on change within us. This is often the most difficult thing to do – since it requires us to come to terms with our demons, accept them and then get rid of them. It is time to look within for traces of any bias as far as gender equality is concerned, before we point fingers and expect others around us to change. Looking within, and helping ourselves change is not a form of judgment or self-condemnation. As you will read below, we are only helping ourselves get rid of what we thought was “normal”.

In order to overcome gender inequality we must address our own bias. Gender related bias that hold women back can include outright discrimination to deep-rooted unconscious attitudes. The normalisation of everyday sexism has led to an invisible gender bias that we often don’t recognise. Human beings don’t know how to be wholly unbiased; from the classroom to the boardrooms – at an early age, we are conditioned to believe that girls are this way and boys are that way. It’s about challenging these ‘natural’ thoughts by examining, questioning and having open conversations.

Basic anthropology tells us that groups tend to recruit new members who are similar to themselves. So a predominantly male field will often choose a male candidate. This is an influential factor in why women are significantly underrepresented in traditionally male-dominated areas, and senior positions. Changing our bias in recruiting is integral, and admitting our own bias is an important step to a more open, diverse and fair workplace.

This is everyone’s issue – men and women, and extends to women’s own limiting self-beliefs.

Biases are also very apparent in the highly unfair recruitment processes where it may not be rare to choose candidates for roles based on gender and not skill and ability.

It’s a common perception that women are generally better suited to support type roles, whereas men will excel in leadership positions; however it is these kinds of stereotypes that form the basis of gender discrimination at work and action must take place to prevent it happening.

The hiring and allocation of work must to be conducted on the basis of an individual’s abilities and character, regardless of whether they are male or female and the preference of customers, clients or other employees is not a legitimate and protected reason to treat employees differently according to gender. – Undercover Recruiter.

3. Gender Equality – Being Fair and Transparent about Pay

That women at work are under paid and under represented is an uncomfortable truth we need to accept and address. The first step towards doing so is by being transparent about any gender pay gaps that exist and tackling them. Equal pay for equal work is a policy that must be a principle at your workplace, and not just a policy. This, as a principle underlines fairness and puts equality into practice.

” In 1976, the Equal Remuneration Act was passed with the aim of providing equal remuneration to men and women workers and to prevent discrimination on the basis of gender in all matters relating to employment and employment opportunities. This legislation not only provides women with a right to demand equal pay, but any inequality with respect to recruitment processes, job training and promotions.” – Wikipedia

We are still battling for these basic rights, even though the law mandates for men and women to be paid equally for equal work. What does that say? We have a long, long way to go before we can make gender equality a reality.

4. Gender Equality – Taking mentoring seriously

The very first thing we spoke about, in this post was on understanding the principle of equity with reference to implementing gender equality at the workplace. One of the ways you can ensure an ‘equitable’ growth for your female employees is by understanding that mentorship plays a huge role in boosting their progress, improving their skills, and helping them build strong profiles which will help them grow and sustain in the ever competitive, ever evolving world of work.

Focus on having mentorship programs for your employees, and specific ones for your female employees. Wondering how cost-effective it would be? You can implement this with zero cost, and reap tons of benefits. One does not need to have a formal structure for mentorship programs. Building this into the culture of your organization, where your employees are encouraged to reach out and help each other is the most sustainable and effective way of going about it.

This also includes training those in managerial positions about how to tackle issues related to gender equality at work.

5.  Gender Equality – Encouraging more women to take up Leadership roles

The most effective way to bring about change is by leading through example. By encouraging more women to take up leadership roles, you put them in a position where they are able to help and mentor other women (and men!) around them. Role modeling is a very effective method of demonstrating the change you wish to bring about. This is also a very strong antidote to the phenomenon of the glass ceiling. 

The glass ceiling in India is a reality today, because of a culmination of factors – socio-cultural, legal, personal, and organizational, and cannot be attributed to any single factor. Hema Krishnan, in her interview at IIM Bangalore on Glass Ceiling in India : A Reality for Women?,  speaks about how every woman is capable of accessing the top most rungs:

Theoretically, every woman is capable of reaching the top of her organization. What sets women such as Indra Nooyi and Chanda Kochchar apart from the rest of the similarly talented women are: a high level of sustained self-confidence and emotional quotient, persistence and patience, the right mentors at various stages of their career, an extremely supportive family and a little bit of luck or opportunity.

It is due to centuries of subjugation, discrimination and domination that the struggle to make one’s talent known and respected in the professional realm, is a big deal for women in India. It wouldn’t be untrue, neither would it be a fleeting statement if we said that it is not half as difficult for the men.

6. Gender Equality – ‘Creating’ opportunities (work from home, child-care, etc.)

In order to ensure that the world of work does not lose out on potentially great talent pool – it is necessary that a more inclusive environment which encourages gender diversity and equality is created.

One of the major barriers that prevent women from reaching to the top of their career is the lack of childcare support. Again this ranges from complete stigma to deep-seated traditions in the role of mothers. Employer’s play a vital role in supporting mothers; work together to agree on a fair and balanced workplace goal that will drive productivity, whilst allowing flexibility and remote working where possible.

Progression and promotions are considerably more difficult to achieve when you take time off, which has a disproportionate effect on women who continue to hold the lion’s share of childcare responsibility. To relieve working mothers of the domestic and childcare burden, parental leave for fathers should be promoted. Not only will this allow mothers to invest more time in their careers, but research has shown that fathers want to be more engaged and involved in child care duties. – Undercover Recruiter

Making space for work from home opportunities for women, creating launch pads for women who’ve been away from work for a while for various reasons, and not letting gender biases form a basis of recruitment (to begin with this!) are some ways you can actively contribute to implementing Gender Equality in the world of work.

Go out of your way to ensure you treat your employees equally, irrespective of their gender. Invest your trust in them, and reap a handsome Return On Investment. Recognize merit and celebrate it. Understand that, basically, it all boils down to you, to a great extent.

But why go that extra mile? Because like we said earlier, without equity, there can be no equality!